Funny Stuff
- Thread starter Chris - Nexus Eclipse
- Start date
Was that the same group who's sweaty crotched overalls went 'missing' after the days play??
Dirty b*startd!!!
Accidental shootings of team mates are always the best...
I work for a girls school and decided that they were gonna go 'ballin as their 'Christmas Outing' last year (so that i could get payed to play 'ball ).
After they had been given the talk (this is the trigger etc) they walked out of the safe zone...
Blonde A - I can't get my glove on...
Blonde B - Put you gun under your arm and use your other hand...
A - Ok (struggles with gun and glove)
!!!BANG!!!
B - Ow (starts to cry 3 feet away)
A - What's the matter?
I work for a girls school and decided that they were gonna go 'ballin as their 'Christmas Outing' last year (so that i could get payed to play 'ball
).After they had been given the talk (this is the trigger etc) they walked out of the safe zone...
Blonde A - I can't get my glove on...
Blonde B - Put you gun under your arm and use your other hand...
A - Ok (struggles with gun and glove)
!!!BANG!!!
B - Ow (starts to cry 3 feet away)
A - What's the matter?
Funniest thing I've seen on a field is also the most painfull, I'd taken qa few mates along to a local site for a punter day. Just after lunch we where playing a fort game, and got stuck in a two story building. Opposition team stormed our building so we went legging it up to the 2nd floor, as the last guy came running up the stairs he got shot from below, some how the ball missed both his legs and hit square on his nuts, he doubled over planting his face into the stairwell, breaking his goggles and nose into the bargin.
Was either that or last time I played I went charging down on some bloke in a bunker and found a suprise 4ft drop on my way, royaly wrecking my ankle (went a great shade of purple/blue for a week and a half). Lady in casualty said it was damn funny. Missus tried to ban me from paintball.
Was either that or last time I played I went charging down on some bloke in a bunker and found a suprise 4ft drop on my way, royaly wrecking my ankle (went a great shade of purple/blue for a week and a half). Lady in casualty said it was damn funny. Missus tried to ban me from paintball.
Funniest ever...
The absolute funniest paintball moment ever at our field was the "dual" suicide. We had an all newbie father son group with around thity people, plus a few walkons with highend guns. The last game of the day, the group let the expereienced guys play with them. It was 18 v 18. Near the end of the game, there were only three players left on one side, all newbies, and about ten on the other. Three of the ten had cockers. Well, two of the three were kids and were afraid of the opponents big guns. They were standing at the back of the field discussing what to do and all of a sudden one of the kids pulls a squad buster and hits the other kid in the back a foot away. Both were covered head to toe in blue. All of us refs were laughing our asses off.
The absolute funniest paintball moment ever at our field was the "dual" suicide. We had an all newbie father son group with around thity people, plus a few walkons with highend guns. The last game of the day, the group let the expereienced guys play with them. It was 18 v 18. Near the end of the game, there were only three players left on one side, all newbies, and about ten on the other. Three of the ten had cockers. Well, two of the three were kids and were afraid of the opponents big guns. They were standing at the back of the field discussing what to do and all of a sudden one of the kids pulls a squad buster and hits the other kid in the back a foot away. Both were covered head to toe in blue. All of us refs were laughing our asses off.
I've had a couple here and there that stand out as funny incidents, some not entirely on the field but they qualify as paintball incidents none the less. First I'll mention all the stupid things I've done:
1. Playing hopperball (which I hate), I tried to get a full load in so that I'd at least be confident about it. No, I'm not that bad of a shot but I like to have paint on me in case something goes not according to plan. Off the break, I run up the top tape and see an easy shot at my mirror... POPOPOPOP *air not balls* I check my Revo to see if it's on. Yep. HERE COMES PAINT. Oh crap I packed it too full!! I open the lid to get some out so it'll feed...and get lit up. Pissed off I hold my gun up in the air, and all that paint comes rolling right out.
2. 3man tourney, finals. I throw more paint and 3x more trash talk than usual to take out the left tape, which I do successfully. Unfortunately I run out of paint soon thereafter, so nothing left to lose I go on a flag run. I try to get down fast to avoid the paint coming at me and DO NOT MAKE IT. Rather, I slip one something, God only knows exactly what, and I do a belly flop with the refs and all but 2 other teams out of the whole tourney watching. Gun goes one way, hopper the other, I another, all covered with paint. We win, but I have to ask the refs for some extra time between games to reload with paint and clean myself off.
3. Driving to a distant tourney LATE. I was driving alone to a field I'd never been to which was out of state and I had only a rudimentary map with a few roads labeled wrong. For some reason, I end up in a town so far out that no gas (petrol) stations are open still, can't find a hotel and I NEED TO TAKE A CRAP BADLY. I drive around everywhere looking for some place to go, finding nothing. So naturally I look for somewhere close enough to where I can JUST get to it in time. No such luck. I soil myself slightly. Aha! I see an unlit house that no one is parked at... Thinking fast, and moving even faster, I park the car in some place unlit, turn out the headlights but keep it running, go to the nearest bush up next to the house to avoid any police or indignant neighbors, drop my pants, experience tremendous relief, and thinking "blah, they're soiled anyway" take off my underwear and wipe my ass with them and leave them there. Oh wait...that's not all. I wipe my hand off on the nearest plant, which turns out to be a rather healthy marijuana plant. I HAUL ASS OUT OF THERE IMMEDIATELY TO AVOID GETTING SHOT. I make it to the hotel 6 hours before needing to meet my team that morning, play with a borrowed gun cause mine's down, and have the crappiest day of paintball I've ever had.
More forthcoming, but I'm dozing off right now...
zzzzz...
1. Playing hopperball (which I hate), I tried to get a full load in so that I'd at least be confident about it. No, I'm not that bad of a shot but I like to have paint on me in case something goes not according to plan. Off the break, I run up the top tape and see an easy shot at my mirror... POPOPOPOP *air not balls* I check my Revo to see if it's on. Yep. HERE COMES PAINT. Oh crap I packed it too full!! I open the lid to get some out so it'll feed...and get lit up. Pissed off I hold my gun up in the air, and all that paint comes rolling right out.
2. 3man tourney, finals. I throw more paint and 3x more trash talk than usual to take out the left tape, which I do successfully. Unfortunately I run out of paint soon thereafter, so nothing left to lose I go on a flag run. I try to get down fast to avoid the paint coming at me and DO NOT MAKE IT. Rather, I slip one something, God only knows exactly what, and I do a belly flop with the refs and all but 2 other teams out of the whole tourney watching. Gun goes one way, hopper the other, I another, all covered with paint. We win, but I have to ask the refs for some extra time between games to reload with paint and clean myself off.
3. Driving to a distant tourney LATE. I was driving alone to a field I'd never been to which was out of state and I had only a rudimentary map with a few roads labeled wrong. For some reason, I end up in a town so far out that no gas (petrol) stations are open still, can't find a hotel and I NEED TO TAKE A CRAP BADLY. I drive around everywhere looking for some place to go, finding nothing. So naturally I look for somewhere close enough to where I can JUST get to it in time. No such luck. I soil myself slightly. Aha! I see an unlit house that no one is parked at... Thinking fast, and moving even faster, I park the car in some place unlit, turn out the headlights but keep it running, go to the nearest bush up next to the house to avoid any police or indignant neighbors, drop my pants, experience tremendous relief, and thinking "blah, they're soiled anyway" take off my underwear and wipe my ass with them and leave them there. Oh wait...that's not all. I wipe my hand off on the nearest plant, which turns out to be a rather healthy marijuana plant. I HAUL ASS OUT OF THERE IMMEDIATELY TO AVOID GETTING SHOT. I make it to the hotel 6 hours before needing to meet my team that morning, play with a borrowed gun cause mine's down, and have the crappiest day of paintball I've ever had.
More forthcoming, but I'm dozing off right now...
zzzzz...
thinking about it makes me laugh.....
The first game I ever played was a pretty good laugh. I was with three other guys and we were attacking the castle. Since this was my first game, I stayed further back and let the better guys go forward. My mistake was I stayed in one place way too long. I was trying to snipe out of a mini-house window when all of a sudden a paintball came out of no where and nailed be right in the face. It had rained a day eairlier so there was a lot of mud. Never being hit by a paintball before, I took the hit as if someone puched me in the face. About as stupid as anything can look, the force of the paintball made me slip backwards getting my whole back muddy, and putting in clear view for fire. Just as I was getting up some knucklehead had been watching my circus act and decided to make it better. He comes up without me knowing it and pelts me twice in the ass, wich startles me again and knocking down in the mud. After the game ended I looked pretty bad. Paint on my face and butt, plus mud everywhere! LOL! I must say, I wish someone had a video camera so I could see it all again.
The first game I ever played was a pretty good laugh. I was with three other guys and we were attacking the castle. Since this was my first game, I stayed further back and let the better guys go forward. My mistake was I stayed in one place way too long. I was trying to snipe out of a mini-house window when all of a sudden a paintball came out of no where and nailed be right in the face. It had rained a day eairlier so there was a lot of mud. Never being hit by a paintball before, I took the hit as if someone puched me in the face. About as stupid as anything can look, the force of the paintball made me slip backwards getting my whole back muddy, and putting in clear view for fire. Just as I was getting up some knucklehead had been watching my circus act and decided to make it better. He comes up without me knowing it and pelts me twice in the ass, wich startles me again and knocking down in the mud. After the game ended I looked pretty bad. Paint on my face and butt, plus mud everywhere! LOL! I must say, I wish someone had a video camera so I could see it all again.
slippery floor
Ok fuuniest things happening to me all revolved around the same room it was really open and you could seen in from two sides
__ __ -----___
I
I
I
_____ _____I
k I
X
I
_____________I
it was at a carpeted indoor field which is where i ussually play isnt it convenient and in a moderately sized area centered on the x and leading continuing into the room the carpet wouldnt stay down and it was really slippery concrete . Funniest first .
1. the downright funniest thing was one of my friends was shooting through the doorway at k having a fire fight out the north windows . i sprinted up to the door slipped on the x landed on my back on the floor kicked my friend and knocked him into the doorway where he was promptly shot out . IT was even funnier when a guy from the other team ran into the recently cleared room and got shot out by me who was still lying on the floor laughing my ass off .
2. First time we were there we were playing a tag game and i ran out of paint one of my friends was having a shootout from a bunker in front of the x and i was sitting in the doorway . he got shot out about 6 times and each time since it was all i could do i ran over tagged him in and ran back the last time i slipped while running ended up on my back put my hand in the air and called myself out at which point the guy my buddy was firefighting with (who hadnt heard me ) put an end to my pesky tagging my teammate back in by shooting my hand and gun with impunity .
Ok fuuniest things happening to me all revolved around the same room it was really open and you could seen in from two sides
__ __ -----___
I
I
I
_____ _____I
k I
X
I
_____________I
it was at a carpeted indoor field which is where i ussually play isnt it convenient and in a moderately sized area centered on the x and leading continuing into the room the carpet wouldnt stay down and it was really slippery concrete . Funniest first .
1. the downright funniest thing was one of my friends was shooting through the doorway at k having a fire fight out the north windows . i sprinted up to the door slipped on the x landed on my back on the floor kicked my friend and knocked him into the doorway where he was promptly shot out . IT was even funnier when a guy from the other team ran into the recently cleared room and got shot out by me who was still lying on the floor laughing my ass off .
2. First time we were there we were playing a tag game and i ran out of paint one of my friends was having a shootout from a bunker in front of the x and i was sitting in the doorway . he got shot out about 6 times and each time since it was all i could do i ran over tagged him in and ran back the last time i slipped while running ended up on my back put my hand in the air and called myself out at which point the guy my buddy was firefighting with (who hadnt heard me ) put an end to my pesky tagging my teammate back in by shooting my hand and gun with impunity .
during a rec ball game
during a rec ball game me and 2 of my other team were walking threw a path off the field and we tripped on something and wen we looked down it was a dead deer carcus, we took this and used it as a shield for the rest of the game, it worked great!!!
during a rec ball game me and 2 of my other team were walking threw a path off the field and we tripped on something and wen we looked down it was a dead deer carcus, we took this and used it as a shield for the rest of the game, it worked great!!!