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Joke of the Day

Discussion in 'Speak your Brains' started by Missy-Q, Jun 20, 2016.

  1. Orinoco Platinum Member

    Orinoco
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    What award was given to the creator of the knock knock joke.


    The no-bell prize.

    (Put me out of my misery)
     
  2. nick "the shadow cat" Illegitimi non carborundum

    nick "the shadow cat"
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    A man goes to the will reading of his crazy uncle and find that he has been left a pet camel. Stuck for ideas as to what to do with it he starts riding it to work to save on petrol in the car. His mates ask him "is its a boy or girl camel?" The man says "I don't know?". A few days later he tells his friends "it's a boy camel". His pals ask how he knows. The guy says"I was sitting at some traffic lights when a bloke in a white van shouted out "Oi look at the dick on that camal"! Well I found it funny anyway.
     
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  3. Missy-Q 300lb of Chocolate Love

    Missy-Q
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    A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!'' The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you.''
     
  4. nick "the shadow cat" Illegitimi non carborundum

    nick "the shadow cat"
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    A remote foreign legion fort gets a new captain. On his first day there he's inspecting his new base when he spots a manky old camel sitting in the court yard. He asks his sergent "what it's doing there?"
    The sergent replies" well sir the nearest town is 5 miles away and the men get lonely... you know for sex and thats where the camal comes in." The captain is digusted and says "I will never use the camel that way." After about 4 months the captain is pulling his hair out. He orders his sergent to bring the camel in his office. He then buggers the crap out the poor beast. When he is done he say to his sergent" you can tell the men they can use it like that again." The sergent says " well actually sir they ride it to town and use the brothel!"
     
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Planet Eclipse Manic Paintball G.I Milsim Tipmann BZ Paintball DYE Paintball Valken Paintball